Dear applicants, fellows, friends, and other things we don't have,
We here at the Brown School of Law (or, as our students affectionately term it, BS Law) take great pride in the way we teach things. Always on the cutting edge of innovative teaching, the faculty here at Brown Law have really embraced the idea of post-modernism. Indeed, we are the #1 place to go if you want a post-modern approach to legal teaching. No other school does it like we do, because the way we do it is by not doing it at all (whatever the 'it' in that sentence referred to). Plain and simple, the best way to learn something has always been by divine inspiration, and that's what we strive for here at Brown Law. We don't offer "real world" experiences, legal clinics, or any other such nonsense. No, the only way a Brown Law student can take any knowledge away from our school at all is if God or some random act of the universe gave it to him--because, rest assured, our faculty is renowned for not teaching anything.
Do you want to practice law? Then, chances are, Brown Law is not the place for you. We offer legal concentrations ranging from nothing to more nothing, and recent course listings have included nothing. Indeed, even Much Ado About Nothing is much too much for one of our courses. You will learn nothing about the legal system or legal practice in general, and the only experience you'll get is a brush with nonexistence. However, don't let the course listings and all that fool you; Brown Law is not an easy school, by any means. We have a very special grading system here, and we think it's a major step up from the Pass/Fail/Honors nonsense going on at Yale. We eliminated the superfluous grades in that system, and so the only grade a student can get is an F. In this respect, we're pretty similar to Harvard.
I recently had a potential applicant ask me a question about what kind of students attend BS Law. This question gave me some difficulty, because, well, it's pretty darn hard to predicate anything of a nonexistent entity. But, if pressed, I would say that they're a pretty nebulous bunch. Some might say that they're careless, because they lack the capacity for caring, but I prefer the word insouciant. They're also entirely selfless, which is a virtue, I am told, and they're also pretty open-minded, seeing as their brains extend beyond the realm of the living and the physical. As such, our students are pretty much above any law, including the natural ones. Here at Brown Law, we give you license to defy the laws of gravity, and, if you so choose, you don't have to exist at any particular location in time. If you feel like you fit into that category, then I highly encourage you to apply to BS Law.
If you're interested in hearing more about Brown Law, you can check out our Facebook page at http://www.facebook.com/pages/Brown-University-School-of-Law/113180462092231?sk=info. Become a fan, write nonsense on our wall, we love it all. We'll also keep you guys up to date here on our blog, so come back often! Post questions you have for us in the comments, or you can email us at Brown.University.School.of.Law@gmail.com. You can also pray to us, although there's no guarantee that we'll answer any of those (after all, we have countless students praying to get into BS Law all the time!). Also, while I am not allowed to tell you to click on the ads on the side, I can insinuate that I might like it if you did. We hope to hear from you!
Diatonically yours,
The Admissions Team
No comments:
Post a Comment